What’s My Problem?

From a young woman in Romania: Hi! I am very anxious and since I was little I can say my doubts and fears controlled my life. These fears and thoughts I have are totally absurd.

When I had a surgery it was hard to eliminate the anesthetic and the nurse told me that I will get sick and forced me to use to toilet even if the anesthesia hadn’t totally passed. I forced myself to pee and I got scared by doing it and this fear continued for a while even if I started having kidney pains.

I did’t take any treatment for these problems. As absurd as may seem..it’s real. How can I stop thinking like that and what’s my problem?

You already know what your problem is. You have a long history of being overly anxious. It’s possible that you have a sensitive temperament. It’s possible that when you were young, you didn’t get the coaching and support you needed so you could learn how to be more confident and less afraid.

There’s plenty to be anxious about in modern life. Lacking sufficient skills for self-calming and for self-protection, you are too emotionally open to manage every day stressors. It’s as if your nerves are too close to the surface.

If you can get to a therapist, please consider it. A therapist will help you come to terms with your fears and will help you learn to use your sensitivities in a more positive way. If you can’t get to a therapist, get yourself one of the workbooks on how to handle anxiety from one of the online booksellers. In addition, I often refer people to the book “Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy” by Dr. David Burns.

Please follow through and start educating yourself about anxiety. You deserve to live a life that isn’t shadowed by so many doubts and fears.

I wish you well.

Dr. Marie

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