My boyfriend and best friend have been together for a year and I a little over that. He’s the best thing that could ever happen to me and we’re in love with each other but people that I’ve been with in the past keep coming to him and telling him stuff about me and he said he can’t take learning something new about me almost everyday. So I told him all he wants to know about my past and now he sees me differently I don’t want him to because I’m not a different person I’m the same one. He also has a past and told me about his but he can’t get over mine. He says he’s trying to but it just stays in the back of his mind how do I help him get over it I want him in my life forever and I don’t want to put him through this anymore.
I am very glad that you have found someone who makes you happy. You boyfriend’s reaction isn’t something that you can help with any more than what you are doing. Let him know that the choices you’ve made in the past all led up to the two of you being together. That had you not gone down those roads you wouldn’t have been able to appreciate the connection you have now.
Let him know that you understand if he needs time to understand this, but in the end there is nothing either of you can do to change the past — all you can do is look at it though a different lens.
Wishing you patience and peace,
Dr. Dan
Proof Positive Blog @ PsychCentral
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