My friend recently introduced me to miscopy.com which is a website normally used for watching gore videos mostly including death. My friend introduced it as sick and disturbing but after watching a couple of the videos i found that i kinda enjoyed it. Not in a sexual way though its like i was watching a funny cat video although instead of cats doing silly things it was people dieing i brushed it off as a one time thing and that i was just being an edgy teenager (which i still think is the reason btw) but when i was at school one day i got the urge to watch some more so i went into the bathroom and did just that its progressed to the point in where i send some snapchat clips of some of the videos that i find amusing they for the most part think that the videos are funny too although they could just be saying that. Anyways i think ive just got a messed up sense of humor and i just wanted to ask what you people thought.
A: The fact this concerns you is the most important part of your email. The imagery on the site you mentioned, others like it, and even mainstream news can have secondary effects from watching it. Whenever people have been pulled into a compulsive need to watch a specific type of material (porn, violence, bad news items, etc.) the concern becomes understanding more about what is beneath the need. The fact that you needed to do this during school means that it is being given more of a focus in your life than it should. One way to determine the strength of an obsessive-compulsive behavior is to stay completely away from the site or anything like it for 30 days. See how this feels and if it is still such a necessary thing. If you find it hard or impossible to stay away, I would encourage you to talk with a therapist about it.
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