Can You Please Tell Me Why I’m Feeling this Way?

From Dubai: My mother died about 2 years ago but even before that I was always depressed as far as I can remember. But ever since she died I don’t feel like myself, right now I’m typing this messages but i feel like someone else is doing it for me,and I’m just in a tiny corner somewhere waiting for someone to help me get out.

I don’t feel real, my head feels heavy, sometimes I can’t breath; I feel hollow and I’ve lost interest on almost everything. I used to be passionate in learning about so many things; right now if I were to die, i prefer that than living at the moment. I feel like what’s happening to me is not real, like it’s just a dream and I just need to wake up.

I don’t feel any type of emotion, and even if i do, i feel like it someone else. I feel like someone else is slowing erasing who I really am deep inside, and replacing me with a different soul. I feel lost, I don’t care what happens to me, if I die, it wont matter. and I don’t really know what’s wrong wi th me. I just don’t . Can you please tell me why I’m feeling this way?

A: It’s possible that you are suffering from incomplete grieving. You were already depressed when your mother died. It’s possible that you couldn’t bear to feel the feelings of loss on top of the depression. You therefore coped by shutting off all of your feelings. That may have been a useful strategy for a short time but now you can’t seem to pull yourself out of it.

A therapist can provide you with the emotional safety net you need to pull out your feelings. It will be difficult to feel them. But you’ve already come to terms with the fact that the way you are living now isn’t a solution. With the support and guidance of a therapist, you can gradually let yourself feel what you need to feel and not be overwhelmed by it.

Please take care of yourself and get the help you need. You deserve it.

I wish you well.
Dr. Marie

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