Help with My Father

My father has been diagnosed with OCD Disorder, but I feel like there is more to his disorder than just obsessions and compulsions. His behavior include emotional manipulation, intense reactions, exaggerations, and he has paranoia to a certain extent.He keeps calling my mother daily to see where she is, and secretly follows her to work most mornings. He demanded for all her passwords for social media, as well as her phone.When she comes home late from work, even for 5 minutes, he creates a scene and argues with her. He threatens that he will kill himself. When they argue, if to him it feels like the problem wont be resolved, to make amends, he threatens her. He threatens her with not drinking or eating, constantly drinks alcohol with his medication. He is also delusional in the fact that my mother is cheating on him, when this is not the case. He took extreme measures to grab her cell phone, download apps that can see all the text messages sent and received, and he also has a GPS on her constantly tracking her. At the same time, he sits in his office after work most of the day and listens to 5 hour voice recordings of some type of listening device he has in her work office, or here at home. It might even be somehow installed on her phone, he is constantly trying to find out a possible cheating going on, or even trying to look for lies in the voice recordings. In an altercation, he slept in the car for many days, tried to drive while he was drunk at the same time telling me that the medication he is taking has severe interactions with alcohol, and that he can die any second, even wrote a will.The next mornings he wakes up like nothing happened, acts like nothing happened, and continues to repeat the same things over and over. His facial expression looks extremely different, as if he is psychologically disturbed. He refuses to see a psychologist because he sees it as a way to throw money in the trash.He says things like, You are a ll smart, but Im the only one crazy. How can I help him?

I agree that there may be more symptoms than his diagnoses would allow for. He needs help. However, he is not open to it. That is a problem.

Since he won’t seek help, then your family should contact a mental health professional. They might recommend that your mother acquire a restraining order or that she temporarily remove herself and the rest of the family from the situation. Your father has gone to extreme measures to track your mother. That is worrisome behavior.

Encourage your father to seek help. However, he may not take your advice. If he is a danger to himself (i.e., threatens to end his life) or threatens to hurt anyone, call the authorities immediately. They will come to the home, evaluate the situation and take him to the hospital if necessary. Once at the hospital, he will be given treatment.

I’m sorry you’re faced with this dilemma. Do not hesitate to call the authorities. Acquiring outside help from mental health professionals will help you to navigate this difficult issue. Please stay safe and write again if you have additional questions.

Dr. Kristina Randle

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