Why Does My Boyfriend Look at Pictures of Naked Women?

From a woman in the U.S.: Well I just found out my man likes a lot of half naked women’s pictures on Instagram and I mean a lot. I feel bad because I thought I’m all he ever wants and dreamed of but it doesn’t feel that way. also he is doing it at the same time we are together like I’m on his Facebook everyone knows we are together but on Instagram I’m not on there it’s like I don’t exist but he’s on there more than he is on Facebook also these girls are opposite to how I look. I feel like he want someone else and is just with me because he can’t get those girls

I’m just hurt because he was even doing it while we are sitting next to each other even the day before Christmas. am I crazy or should I just be done with him? I know that it’s wrong so I don’t disrespect him that way and I asked him did u know it was wrong he said yes. I said so when where u gonna stop? he said eventually I would have stopped. he said he didn’t know I wasn’t okay with it and then he gets mad at me and brings up stuff he don’t like just to turn it around on me. I just think when did you ever think disrespecting me like this would be okay to do?

I’m not crazy jelouse I just feel betrayed because I would not be doing that since I’m with him. I said ok talk to whoever you want say hi like normal pictures but he took it to far liking a lot of half naked women everyday what should I do i can’t seem to move past it

You shouldn’t just “move past it”. You and your boyfriend have important talking to do about how you define respect and how you want each other to behave. If you don’t come to a clear, mutual agreement, issues like this will fester and grow and the relationship will fall apart.

Currently, you do not have an agreement. You feel disrespected and insecure. He says he is willing to stop but then defends his behavior by pointing out things he doesn’t like about you. It’s as if he believes he can continue doing something you don’t like as long as he can find fault with you. This is not a mature way to handle things.

I hope the two of you can get beyond that point have a loving discussion about what your couple-ness means. That kind of talk brings people closer. If you want to stay together but can’t get anywhere when you try to talk about hard stuff, a couples therapist could help you,

I wish you well.

Dr. Marie

from Ask the Therapist http://bit.ly/2HNst8c
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