Monday, 23 July 2018

How Do I Get Over a Break Up?

From a teen in the U.S.: I’ve been on and off depressed for about two years over other things. Eventually I Kind of distance dated a girl online for a year and got really attached. Since we broke up in January I’ve been depressed about her, and thinking about her with other guys makes me angry. I had been getting slightly better I think, but yesterday she messaged me and basically revealed that she’s already over me and that she doesnt even consider me a real ex because it was over the Internet. I feel the most depressed I’ve been in a while like I’ve relapsed. I dont know what to do

I’m so sorry you are hurting so much. But I don’t think the root of the problem is the break-up. My guess is that you are focusing on the relationship because you are stuck in your depression and don’t know what to do. Thinking about the young woman is a way you are guarding against being overwhelmed by the bigger picture.

It concerns me that you have been depressed on and off for two years. You don’t mention treatment. Depression is a real thing. It isn’t something a person can generally just snap out of. A long term problem with depression like yours doesn’t usually just go away.

I urge you to make an appointment with a mental health counselor to get a thorough evaluation and treatment recommendations. You deserve the support and practical tools that a therapist can provide.

I wish you well.
Dr. Marie



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