From Singappore: I am dissatisfied with life. My sister went out with my crush in Jan. My mom didnt let me go to Summer School with my friends. And now none of my best friends are here to celebrate my 21st Birthday. This all has upset me a lot this days. Hence I just choke whenever I think about it.
I have been studious all life. I can’t recall any best moments. The last lovely moments are of my 9th and 10th grade schooling time. I fear of myself being this way. I am 21 and I am never gonna stop aging.
My choking and crying has become too common these days. I relate everything to my life and feel dissatisfied. I first have to stop crying and choking. I blame my Parents for my life. Hence any denial from them spurs me on and I get very mad. I don’t scream or talk, I choke and cry. Please help me.
A: You are very stuck. You haven’t been able to find ways to solve your problems so you are left with anger that has no place to go. All you feel able to do is feel helpless and cry. That helps you get some of the anger out, but it doesn’t solve the problems.
You are 21. It’s time for you to get in charge of your own life. You are an adult. Whatever mistakes your parents made as parents are done. There is no point to blaming them or arguing with them anymore. As you already know, that goes nowhere. After you assign blame, you still have to figure out how to live your life.
First — your birthday. There is no reason not to celebrate your birthday when your friends come back home. Find a quiet way to privately celebrate yourself on the actual day. Then plan a party to celebrate your friends’ return and your birthday in the fall. There are never too many reasons to have a party.
Then — it’s up to you to make good memories. No one can do it for you. Get involved with activities where you will meet more people who like to do things you like to do. If you aren’t sure what would make you happy, join in a number of activities to explore them.
I think you will feel better if you start taking positive steps to get out of the stuck place. If you do take some steps and you still cry every day, then you should see a doctor to make sure there isn’t something amiss physically. Sometimes things like a thyroid condition make a person hypersensitive. If you are physically fine and are still so distressed, I urge you to find a counselor to give you the support you may need to take charge of your life.
I wish you well,
Dr. Marie
from Ask the Therapist http://ift.tt/2u2KXZW
via https://ifttt.com/ IFTTT
No comments:
Post a Comment