For a while now I have been completely obsessed with my own mental health, I am currently in Secondary School with Aspergers and I am thinking about going on to A Levels and Uni to study psychology and Mental Health, however, I am currently obsessing on my own mental health.
One of the main problems is a constant urge and desire to have some sort of serious mental health disorder, and I mean disorders from Schizophrenia to Dissociative Identity Disorder, and I can understand how absolutely horrible that sounds. My mind never seems to drift away from over-analyzing any small part of my day that may be related to some sort of symptom of a disorder (such as overreacting to any thoughts that don’t seem to be mine kind of thing). I have already researched different disorders out of curiosity and know about different symptoms, I don’t believe I am a hypochondriac. I am currently seeing someone about a possible Anxiety Disorder and I believe I am showing some early symptoms of a Dissociative Disorder and some form of Psychosis, but I can’t help but worry about NOT being diagnosed with a disorder.
Most nights I have imagined myself in a mental hospital when I am older or developing some sort of alternate personalities, the idea of someone experiencing these fascinate me, one recent dream of mine I remember was the exact life of me living with DID but I can’t remember it exactly.
I have also been on edge more than normal, I have flinched a shuddered to noises constantly struggling to reassure myself if the noises were real, I have also experienced Depersonalisation for at least 2-3 years which has started to mix with Derealisation which has also kept me on edge.
One thing I think would help with my obsession would be to actually hear the thoughts and experiences of someone with the Disorders I am paranoid about.
I would like to hear an opinion to help calm these obsessive thoughts. (From England)
First, I want to say how much I admire your courage in bringing this issue forward. It must be very difficult for you to experience the symptoms and have a concern about their legitimacy and the diagnosis.
Your genuine struggle with this is one reason something like Munchausen Syndrome is not likely to apply, and your self-described ‘obsessive thoughts’ sound like where the bulk of the work is for you.
I am glad to hear you are in therapy and I would encourage you to talk more directly and deeply with your therapist
Wishing you patience and peace,
Dr. Dan
Proof Positive Blog @ PsychCentral
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