Tuesday 26 September 2017

Why Don’t Family Members Give Me More Support?

From the U.S.: I have a insecurity problem concerning not being supported by my family especially when I am verbally attached by someone….let me give you the last example. I and my sister are caretakers of our 94 y/o Mother and of course it is stressful. I vented about one incident on FB (it really wasn’t that bad and I deleted it). One of the family members came in and called me a “Fing idiot”.

Now I have 3 children and not one of them came on FB or in private and said anything to the writer about it..In fact my son went camping with them this week-end… I feel unloved… If anyone had attacked my children or grandchildren in that way, I would have went off on them… I want to add I do know this stems from childhood insecurities, but just one time I wish someone would “go to bat” for me… I feel like it is me against the world…

A: Have you talked to your family about this? It’s understandable that you want family members to want to go to bat for you without saying anything. They may be unaware of your insecurities. You may put on such a good front that they think you’re able to roll with whatever others say. They may have reasons for not wanting to take on a family member in a public forum like Facebook. Then again, they may be insensitive clods. I can’t tell from a letter. But if you haven’t had a heart to heart with your kids, I do urge you to do so. Our kids, even as adults, sometimes forget that their moms have feelings too.

I wish you well.
Dr. Marie



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